Husbands & Wives Growing Through Marriage | Ephesians 5:22-33

Scripture

• Ephesians 5:22–33

About this sermon

Introduction: Marriage is for the worship of Christ and the pursuit of Christ, like everything else in the Christian life. But like everything else in the Christian life, it is not a self-determined pursuit. We don’t have to grope about, wondering how God wants us to grow in marriage. Our God has told us what faithful marriage looks like. He has told us about the roles of husbands and wives. It is within those roles, it is as we help each other by submitting to God’s design for us in marriage, that husbands and wives grow and help each other grow in the Christian life. On the one hand, marriage challenges us to grow in a very broad fashion. All the character and graces necessary for the Christian life apply to marriage also. Marriage is used by God to help us grow in Christlikeness, just like every other area where we are called to live for Christ. But because we’ve been given specific instructions for marriage, we can also say that there are some unique ways that marriage allows us to grow into Christlikeness. God uses marriage to teach us some very specific lessons. What are those specific areas? Our passage gives us two broad categories. There are two main things that are emphasized when we take all the teaching into account. (1) Husbands are to grow in the love that the Savior Christ has for His bride. (2) Wives are to grow in the respect that a submissive church has for her Head. And tonight, and next week, we are going to focus on these two main areas of emphasis. Tonight we address husbands; next week we address wives. • HUSBANDS ARE TO GROW IN THE LOVE THAT THE SAVIOR CHRIST HAS FOR HIS BRIDE The way we grow in the Christian life in marriage is by keeping Christ’s relationship with the church as a matter of focus. The husband is called to love His wife as Christ loved the church. • THAT LOVE IS A WORSHIPFUL LOVE Husbands are called to love their wives AS Christ loved the church. They are not called to love their wives in the place of Christ. We love our wives because we love Christ. We love our wives AS we love Christ. It is only as we pursue Christ in love, that we will ever love our wives as we should. I would remind us again that the marriage specific instruction in Colossians and Ephesians follows a description of the Spirit filled life in Ephesians, and the Scripture saturated life in Colossians. It is ONLY life lived by the grace of God, in the power of the Spirit of God, in submission to the Word of God, that can make this instruction a matter of the heart. So, right away, before I think about growing in any other area of my walk with God, I must grow in the very first place, in the most important way, and that is, I must grow in my own devotion to the Lord Jesus Christ. I must grow as a man of God. I MUST GROW AS A SPIRITUAL LEADER BY BEING A SPIRITUAL MAN. It is foolishness to think that I will love my wife as Christ loved the church, when I’m not loving Christ and desiring to have His love formed in me. I can’t lead my wife well, when I am not personally committed to the means that God has ordained for the spiritual growth of ALL His people. This is another example of how we often miss the mark by not recognizing that many of the solutions for our needs are experienced in a way that is FIRST INDIRECT. We tend to want to run DIRECTLY to what we see as the problem, when oftentimes what we are seeing is the FRUIT OF A MORE FUNDAMENTAL PROBLEM. This is why if I say, “LOVE YOUR WIFE BY DOING THIS …” what I say next might seem counterintuitive to you. Love your wife by being devoted to prayer. Love your wife by being devoted to God’s Word. Love your wife by being devoted to the Lord’s church. Love your wife by being devoted to integrity and purity. LOVE YOUR WIFE BY BEING DEVOTED TO CHRIST. Love your wife by prioritizing spiritual matters, specifically the matters that are most important for the souls of those who belong to your family. How many husbands depend upon their wives for the spiritual training of their children? • THAT LOVE IS A SELF-MORTIFYING LOVE The love of Christ is sacrificial in nature. Christ gave himself up for the church. He died, He sacrificed Himself, to save the church. He humbled Himself. He laid down His life because He loved her to the uttermost. -There is no more FAITHFUL AND ENDURING love than Christ’s love. ESV John 13:1 Now abefore bthe Feast of the Passover, when Jesus knew that chis hour had come dto depart out of this world to the Father, ehaving loved fhis own who were in the world, he loved them to the end. -No GREATER love than Christ’s love. ESV John 15:13 aGreater love has no one than this, bthat someone lay down his life for his friends. -No more COURAGEOUS AND CARING love than Christ’s love.

Topics

• Marriage